Ailments In Our Political Lingo

In recent times I have been getting mentally tired. I need a mental vacation so I decided to take this week off. But yet I find myself yielding to the wishes of some of the readers of my column who have been bugging me, for some time now, for a further peep into my Compendium of Anguillian Political Quotes. I have yielded to their wishes to give them an appreciation of from whence we came and to enable them to determine if we advanced beyond those times.

The compendium is quite extensive so I now open it at the section which deals with political ailments: ailments of political leaders, of political parties/government and of Anguilla as a whole.

I start with the state of Anguilla’s health and the health of political parties in government. During the difficult days of the 1980s, before we had begun to realise the benefits of the tourism industry on which we had embarked, George Hodge (1988) described conditions this way: “Our country is off track. It is in a sort of feverish position . . .” In other words, it had a high fever.
Ophelia Richardson, speaking at one of PACE’s campaign meetings (1989), seemed to have explained the reason for the fever when she told her listeners that, “We are suffering from a malnutrition of economics.” At that time the island was under ANA’s stewardship and Kenswick Richardson observed (1993) that the party was not in a position to deal with the malnutrition because “the ANA [was] shaking with arthritis.” Apparently ANA’s members were similarly afflicted because, in the words of John Benjamin (1994): “David Carty trembles. Every night [he] has nightmares when he hear about Eddy.”

Victor Banks had similar views about ANA’s state of health but his diagnosis (1993) was more serious: “A comatosed government [ANA], as you full well know, cannot bring the leadership, the progress or the real development which we the people of Anguilla need so badly.”

Ronald Webster, too, was concerned about ANA’s handling of the island’s economic health. To quote him (1993): “We have a dead economy and a frustrated people.” Not only were people frustrated. They were also fast asleep said Rev John A. Gumbs (1993): “Our people are still sleeping and it is time for you to wake up.”

The ADP and the AUP definitely woke them up in the lead up to the 1994 elections. They made the state of ANA’s health a campaign issue. Edison Baird (1994) said most emphatically: “The Anguilla National Alliance is cancerous and on 16th March we goin perform major surgery.” When the votes were counted the ADP/AUP coalition had “perform[ed] major surgery” on the ANA, just as Eddy had pledged, and removed it from office. It spent the next six years recuperating.

With the ADP/AUP coalition in control the state of the island’s economic health, in the early years, saw no immediate improvement. To quote Eric Reid (1994): “This island is fast asleep.” And not only that. “Anguilla [was] paralyzed,” he said. Listen to him in full: “I spoke to a good friend of mine this evening and he said to me that he is thinking about going into the mustard business. And I said: ‘Why, what will happen? What are you going to do with the mustard?’ He said: ‘The way Anguilla is paralyzed [under the ADP/AUP] we need mustard to put under the tongues of the people.’”

Mustard is probably a remedy for certain ailments but it would not have helped Ronald Webster. His problem was much bigger, opined Jeremiah Gumbs (1981), because “he was a sick man who had stopped responding to reason.” Three years later (1984) Terry Harrigan came up with the same diagnosis: “Ronald Webster is practically a mental case. . . . There is a place for those who are mentally disturbed and ANA will provide that.” Shortly thereafter, Webster’s party was removed from power but many people were angry with what they considered as Terry’s lack of respect and gratitude for the Father of the Anguillian Nation.

To think about it, the state of health of our chief ministers was always a subject of public debate. For example, Hubert Hughes went on the platform (1985) telling people that Chief Minister Emile Gumbs (now Sir Emile) “had diarrhea . . . but the diarrhea . . . [he] had was the diarrhea of dumbness . . .” The diarrhea may have affected Emile badly. It may have caused him to lose weight – to get thin – because some months later Hubert (1986) was saying: “We will not permit a little sickling like Emile Gumbs to destroy the future of this island.”

It appears that a diarrhea epidemic affected many of our political leaders. In this regard, Satchel Warner promised (1989) that, “When I win Road South it will be to rid the constituency and Anguilla forever of a bald head character (Hubert Hughes) who suffers from verbal diarrhea.” Lolita Davis-Ifill (1989) agreed that Hubert was suffering from verbal diarrhea. She told a political meeting at Blowing Point that all Hubert does is, “Just froth, froth, froth . . . Talk pure nonsense.” John Benjamin (1994) made a similar observation: “Hubert . . . starts off good but in the middle of his speech he go crazy.”

Indeed, Hubert is known for talking plenty. And no one can stop him. Walcott Richardson once asked (1993), “What you goin do wid him? Throw cornmeal in his mouth? He still goin spit it out!”

People have long wondered how Hubert managed to talk so long without damaging his vocal cords. They got the answer when he told the House of Assembly (1985) that, “I drink a lot of cod liver oil so I can keep my voice clear.” Apart from the bouts of “verbal diarrhea”, Hubert always seemed in relatively good physically shape. And he has boasted about it. Listen to him at a public meeting (1985): “You know I went to the disco the other night and I heard the lil boys say: ‘Eh, eh! How [come] Hubert Hughes could dance so long? I never see a man dance so long!’ I said: ‘Man, I always keep fit!’”

Another of our politicians who worked hard at keeping fit was Everet Romney. He used to walk at mornings. It did him so much good that he urged others to do likewise. I recall him at a meeting, at Blowing Point, saying boastfully (1994): “Do your little exercise! Plenty of you does pass me in the morning doing my six miles and I does feel like I could hold Eddy here, hold Hubert here, throw them there and catch them, I feel so fit!.” Everet felt like a giant. He explained why he started his exercise regime: “I used to like my steak until my cholesterol went up and then I had to spend a lot of money to get it down.”

By the way, having heard Everet say how he would wrap up Eddy reminds me of his conviction that Eddy was not growing mentally – that he was politically retarded. As he put (1994), “All Eddy do is talking, talking, talking. . . . I give him a whole decade . . . to see him mature. He is immature. He proves it. He displays it.” David Carty too thought that Eddy’s mental age was lagging behind his physical age, saying that he would write a play and “create a part for a fowl cock” which Eddy could play (1994).

Fowl cock or not, Eddy was good at throwing political punches. I remember him speaking about Osbourne Fleming’s health saying (1994) that, “From the time Bunton heard that Roderick Webster [was] seeking public office in District Two . . . he [was] going to the bathroom every minute. He done start to loosen up and we haven’t put any pressure upon him as yet.”

Perhaps that bout of diarrhea did Osbourne a world of good because I call to mind Ronald Webster saying, some months earlier, that he (Osbourne) was beginning to swell. That was in 1993 when Webster was reporting, at a political meeting, about the state of health of the ministers in Emile Gumbs’ Government. To quote him: “If you look at Emile Gumbs, he is pale. He is sick. He is weak from the overweight and pressure from the Governor. Osbourne is stooping and swelling from the overload . . . Eric Reid . . . Kenneth Harrigan has lost his hair from the crown of his head.”

Incidentally, because it was Webster versus Osbourne for the Sandy Hill seat, Osbourne’s health got his added attention. He cautioned voters (1993): “Do not vote for Osbourne Fleming. He has what you call an epidemic. He has a contagious disease in his mouth. He speaks on both sides of his mouth at the same time . . .” Then there was Vernon Fleming on his case. Listen to him (1994): “Why doesn’t Osbourne Fleming do his own thing and leave Ronald alone? You know his excuse? ‘Ronald Webster is old.’ Well I got something to tell all you. I bet you ten to one that Ronald is more ‘able’ than him!”

But Osbourne may have been in worse shape had he not followed the advice of David Carty (1984): “I told Bunton and I told Victor last time that they smoking the wrong kind of tobacco and this time it goin choke them.” Before it choked them they stopped smoking and now Victor “is fat like mud,” to use the words of the late Aunt Present of the Pond Ground.

An illness with which some members of the House of Assembly were afflicted was sleeping sickness. To quote Eric Reid (1994): “There are two members of this present [ADP/AUP] Government who can’t sit down for five minutes before they fall asleep.” One of them was Albert Hughes (Belto). Ironically, Roy Rogers reported that Eric himself suffered from sleeping sickness. In his words (1994): “For four and a half years, Eric Reid has been sleep . . . Last time when he ran for office he went to sleep . . . He’s being dragged back in. He’s going to go in a coma this time.”

Thankfully, Eric did not go into a coma. And neither did Belto who admitted openly that he was having some health problems. He touched my heart at a political meeting when he explained (1994): “I can remember fully well that I was sick. I went blind and I went to England in all my struggles, even though I was blind. I went to the FCO, after seeing the needs of this country, and had serious conversations with the minister at that time.”

Two other politicians who did not mind telling people about their health problems were Cuthwin Webster (electoral symbol the Cup) and Kenneth Harrigan. Apparently, Cuthwin had some serious problems. His internal organs were collapsing, and when he launched his election campaign (1994) for the Island Harbour seat he was honestly open about his health. Here is Cuthwin talking about Cuthwin: “I would like to describe Cuthwin Webster to you. He is no good. He is rotten to the core.” His honesty earned him 22 votes, thus the Mighty Pontiques popular calypso song, Twenty-two Votes For Cup. (Be careful how you pronounce for cup!)

As regards Kenneth Harrigan, he had urinary and bowel problems depending on what he ate or drank. I can still hear him at an ANA campaign meeting at Sandy Ground (1994) telling his listeners, “When I drink coconut water I pee a lot and if I eat oats then I sh...”

Having written thus, it is my hope that Kenneth and others in our House of Assembly have gotten rid of their ailments and are now in a position to put all of their efforts into helping Anguilla get rid of the crime epidemic – the cancer of crime – which will destroy us if we do not destroy it. It was a very bitter Kenneth who told the House, on Tuesday last, that some children are “born like angels but turn as animals and wolves as they grow up.”

In my view, Anguilla needs a massive social injection, the different ingredients or components of which must be a matter for broad public debate. The sooner that debate gets underway the better because time is not on our side.